Friday, August 26, 2016


Know what is hot for me -- turns me on???
Kneeling -- picturing myself kneeling at Hands feet.  Yeah I know probably doesn't do much for you -- but me?? god it turns me to jelly.

There was a discussion yesterday on FL that I got mentioned in (which is why I read it -- I honestly have given up reading anything on Fet these days -- but that's another post)

Someone said that you can't be a masochist AND a submissive ..... WTF???!!!  
I can't even wrap my head around someone who believes such nonsense!  I know what I am and no one can change it with some uneducated opinion!  I can amp down my masochism but I cannot amp down the submissive side of me.........which is why images of me kneeling at Hands feet turn me on more than the thought of a beating.  AND yet if I am being beaten I can take as much as he wants to give me............ and absolutely love it.

Mind you (cheeky grin) Hands did mention something the other day about barbed wire wrapped around my dildo -- now THAT I think might just push my masochist limits!!


IF I have to do a 7 day Nature photo challenge -- you folks have to see my daily submissions -- only seems fair ya know???

I present today's picture..............

I'm rather proud of my feather floating in the lake .............

Thursday, August 25, 2016


Yesterday I went to visit his wife and we went out for lunch.  It was a much needed (well for me) visit.  I really do enjoy her and we have more in common than seems possible for two people not actually related.   

I have had a secret I was keeping from both of them -- but I am no good at keeping secrets.  I asked her if there was any chance we could try to do our dinner this weekend (to replace the dinner that got cancelled cause of migraine headaches).  And just kinda blurted out why it was important to me -- the secret.  I kicked myself all the way home cause I really did want to keep it a secret from her too -- but I am worse than a kid when it comes to secrets.  She said she would talk to Hands -- and maybe if he had nothing planned he would agree they could come for dinner this Saturday -- I have my fingers crossed -- hell I have everything that can be crossed - crossed!!

Then when I got home I got a message on Facebook that a teaching friend had challenged me to take a Nature picture a day for 7 days.  I can't say no to a challenge so I went out for a walk last evening and took a slew of pictures.  The one I picked for the challenge was this one of some tall grass by the lake

and here are a couple more I took that I rather liked........ I am enjoying taking the sky as the sun sets - just really love the colours.


Wednesday, August 24, 2016


Craving -- 

not a beating
not a fucking
no those I want 

What I am craving is 
to kneel at his feet and feel his hand on my back -- in my hair -- on my neck.
to hear his voice whisper in my ear 
to know I have pleased him.


Tuesday, August 23, 2016


Many years ago I had emergency surgery.  The nurse shaved me from the belly button to my knees.  I remember thinking I would die of embarrassment at having my 'private areas' shaved bare.

By the time I had recovered from the surgery the hair had grown back in........... but there was something about that experience that I liked.  That summer when it was hot and humid I shaved myself -- with no small amount of contortions to get it done either.  I don't remember what my husband thought of it -- but I loved it!!  It was cooler and neater and felt cleaner.  It also turned me on.

At first I only shaved when the summer came........... but then I started doing it regularly -- because it just felt so damn good.   There have been a few times over the years where I have let it grow in.  BUT I noticed I never felt as aroused.  My jewelry feels so much more erotic -- and I love seeing it every time I look in the mirror.

I know there are women that can't stand being shaved -- they have very strong opinions on the whole issue.  Me -- shrug -- I say to each their own.  I just know that I love the feel of the skin when it is freshly shaved... I love the feel of the smoothness of the lips -- of the mons -- I love feeling the warm summer breezes caress it when I am lying naked in my bed.

Why am I writing about this today??
well truthfully I didn't know what to write about today -- and I shaved yesterday -- and as I laid in my bed the cool sheets brushing against my naked skin I thought I would share with you -- just another little something about me.

Monday, August 22, 2016


My youngest daughter arranged a rather impromptu trip to visit me this weekend... well really just a day - she and the grandkids arrived Friday at dinner and left Saturday just after noon...... 

I was excited she was coming -- and it was a great visit -- we went out to dinner on Friday then watched "The Good Dinosaur".  The 3 boys slept in my room - 2 in the bed and one on the floor, my daughter was in the guest room and I slept on the sofa (or tried to)

Saturday I made pancakes and bacon for breakfast -- we packed up the cars and went off to the beach............. Around 2ish I waved goodbye to them as they took the ramp heading east ....... and I took the ramp heading west .......... 

This weekend should have left me feeling happy and contented -- but it didn't really.  You see -- it has been over a year since my daughter came to visit me. This was the first time she saw my new home. That has really torn my heart out.  It's hard to put words to what I have been feeling.  I do know this weekend hasn't 'fixed' anything.. and a big part of me thinks that was probably the only visit she will ever make here -- at least while I am alive.

And that makes me very sad you know.

I was supposed to go to a munch on Saturday evening -- Hands messaged me and told me he wasn't going -- and that was the deciding factor for me -- I didn't go.  Maybe I should have -- cause it would have gotten me out of the very quiet apartment -- made me socialize with folks........... but I just curled up on the sofa feeling very sad and very alone.

If my kids don't have time for me -- why should anyone else ya know??
Negative negative thoughts going round and round in my head. 


I'll be ok in a day or two.  I am always ok.